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shazfromnorthampton · Posted: Sat Feb 10, 2007 9:55 pm Post subject: Marriage quotes part 2

The difference between marriage and death? Dead people are free.

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. -- Groucho Marx

The marriage of Marxism and feminism has been like the marriage of husband and wife depicted in English common law: Marxism and feminism are one, and that one is Marxism. --Heidi Hartmann [The Unhappy Marriage of Marxism and Feminism]

The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. -- S. T. Coleridge

The only one of your children who does not grow up and move away is your husband.

The theory used to be you marry an older man because they are more mature. The new theory is that men don't mature. So you might as well marry a younger one.

There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. -- James Holt McGavran

To keep your marriage brimming
With love in the marriage cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
Whenever you're right, shut up.

shaz Laughing

speedy · Posted: Sun Feb 11, 2007 8:07 am Post subject:

Amanda

admin · Posted: Sun Feb 11, 2007 8:25 pm Post subject: Funnies

Lol shaz - keep em coming!
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Mikea · Newbie Joined: 08 Jan 2007 Posts: 20 Location: Kettering

Mikea · Newbie Joined: 08 Jan 2007 Posts: 20 Location: Kettering

Should a young married couple be Frank and Earnest Wink

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Two farmers were driving in the country one day when one says

"Stop, stop the car Harry"

Pointing. he then said

"See that rock over there?"

"Arr"

"That's where I first made love to my girlfriend"

"Oh arr"

"and see that rock over there?"

"Oh arr"

"That's where her mother be stood"

"Oh arr, whats she say then?"

"Baaaaa"
Wink

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treborc · Newbie Joined: 07 Feb 2007 Posts: 21

Must be a welsh farmer then.

Mikea · Newbie Joined: 08 Jan 2007 Posts: 20 Location: Kettering

Nah, I think it was Gloucestershire Laughing

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A young couple from the wilds of the country , Nellie and Jed, were getting married, but they had no idea what to do on the wedding night, so they went to the doctors. Ned asked the doctor

'What d'we do on the wedding night?'

The doctor explained the facts of life to our young couple at the end of which he asked

'Do you understand'

Jed turned to Nellie with an inquisitive look on his face

'Sorry Doctor, don't get that'

'Alright, I'll explain it again'

The doctor very carefully explained the facts of life in much more graphic detail at the end of which he said

'Do you understand now'

Again Jed turned to Nellie with an inquisitive look on his face

'Sorry Doctor, still don't get that'

'Right' said the doctor ever mindful of the time

'Nellie, get your knickers down, your skirt up and lay on the table with your legs apart'

The doctor then procedded to demonstrate most graphically the art of love making.

'There' he said, 'Do you understand now?'

'Oh, right' said Jed understanding at last

'How many times a week do I bring er?' Laughing

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